Boat noodles are cheap per bowl and expensive per meal. A single small bowl is about 180 calories: a small tangle of sen lek noodles, four slices of pork, one meatball, a splash of dark broth. Nobody eats one. The stack of empty bowls is the whole culture of the dish, and a stack of five is 900 calories, which is more than a plate of pad see ew.
The broth is not as heavy as it looks. The dark colour comes from blood and dark soy, not fat, and 100ml is about 60 calories. What adds up is the topping: a spoon of kaap moo (pork cracklings) is 40 calories, and the fried garlic in oil is another 20. Ask for it without cracklings and the bowl drops to about 260.
It is a good high volume, low calorie choice if you set a number before you sit down. Three small bowls is about 540 calories with 40g of protein, plenty of broth and vegetables, and you will feel full. The mistake is the side plate of deep fried pork skin or the sweet Thai tea that always seems to come with it.